Over at Slate Alex Heard tells us why backpacking sucks at the same time it rocks. Blaming missing trail posts on Saddam is both innovative and probably correct:

Some would say I screwed up and got “lost.” I would say that the map didn’t match what the trails were doing, and that the cash-strapped Forest Service (which maintains the Pecos Wilderness) has let too many trail-marker signs fall over and rot. So, really, it was all Saddam Hussein’s fault.

If this was in Salon he would have blamed Bush.

This passage basically says it all.

The trip itself was great, though it sucked. We got lucky with the weather. Friday broke rainy, but by the time we got moving the clouds had receded, so the only possible source of misery was everything else.

If it ain’t the weather, there is definitely sure to be something that causes you pain on a decent length trip. You’ll get lost, the bugs will be crazy, you’ll forget something important, like your tent.

I can’t wait to go again.

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This was a much more successful trip than my first. It continued the theme of something annoying that wouldn’t fucking end, so once again I found myself in the woods screaming fuck every twenty minutes. This time it was the barb-wire fence that wouldn’t end. Twice.

Interesting thing about access to national forests is that they don’t have a gate and toll booth like the national parks. You just drive up, park, and hike. But they put the parking lot on the very periphery for obvious reasons, and the area is usually surrounded by private land. You don’t notice this private land as long as you stay on the trail, but fuck if you do notice it if you get lost. Everytime I thought I had a straight shot out of the park I’d run into another goddamned fence. Eventually I ended up going under one since I couldn’t see where it ended up a steep hill, but fuck if there wasn’t another fence in only one hundred yards. Jackass seemed to own land in some sort of Mandelbrot set kinda shape.

Long story short (well, maybe next time) I turned a twelve to fifteen mile hike into twenty-one miles. I did six yesterday and fifteen today, and that fifteen was brutal. I don’t think I’ll walk right for a week, my arms are sunburned, and I’m covered in little tiny scratches from the damn fir trees on an unmaintained trail. All in all, a great time was had. Pictures to be posted tomorrow.

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Nothing going on today… crap, I’m missing Monk! Fuck. I hate it when that happens.

I’ve got some more camping gear. Cheap fishing rod, dug out the digital camera I never use, pulled out the GPS I also never use, and I’m ready to go tomorrow. My legs should be back to normal by morning, so I’m packing tonight and then driving to Fairplay, CO as soon as I wake up.

Like I said, I’m taking the camera, so this time I’ll have some pictures. And it’s only fifteen miles and barely any vertical, so I’ll definitely (fingers crossed) make it the whole way, and I’ll also definitely stay out for two nights.

Ya’ll have a good weekend, and I’ll yap at you on Monday.

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I really loved moments of camping. Early in the morning, when the sun still wasn’t up, all I could hear was the bird chirping. That was great. Later in the day was similar, but all I could hear was the bugs buzzing. That wasn’t so nice.

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If you’re wondering why I’m hiking, here’s my goal. I’d love to climb every one of the fifty-three fourteen-thousand foot peaks in Colorado (ok, at least climb all the non-technical ones. I’m not sure I’m interested in rock-climbing yet). It’s going to take a while. A long while, since I couldn’t conquer an 11.5 this week. But it will happen.

Why the hell else would you live in Colorado? You’ve got to want to hike to its heights.

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This is my next destination. Seems fairly tame, fifteen miles and fifteen hundred feet of vertical. I can easily do this in three days, five miles a day, plus have plenty of time to fish. I haven’t fished since I was a kid, and I only managed to eat something I caught once in Florida when I caught a croaker. Whatever the fuck that is. My next trip to REI I’ll buy a small, cheap rod, a handful of lures, and a compact knife that will serve to fillet the sucker.

Can you imagine anything more gloriously delicious than a fish you just caught and roasted over an open fire (or fried over a stove if it comes to that) after a hard day of hiking? Me neither.

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Wow, I was a little overly optimistic for my first trip. I haven’t been hiking with a pack since college, and that was in the Appalachians where a thousand feet of vertical rise is rare and still leaves you below Denver. I kept thinking I’d almost reached the top, and then I’d take a turn and it would keep going up and up and up. Then I started running out of water, so I turned around, had lunch, and made it back to the car. It was pretty good for a first trip. I hiked for about seven hours, spent the night outside, and went for several miles at a pretty steep slope.

As soon as my body recovers (my left knee was tweaking on my way down, so now I’ve pulled my hammy trying to favor it) I’ll get out to somewhere else. Somewhere else that’s a lot flatter.

Update: I forgot to mention that I did see some wildlife. About twenty minutes in I saw two mule deer, I think. They might have been small elk, though. I heard them before I saw them. I was walking along, breathing hard, when I heard some scraping, looked up, and saw two of them running away from me. I stopped, they stopped, and we looked at each other for a few seconds. I would have taken a picture, but it was getting dark and all I had was a cheap disposable camera. Other pictures will be coming after I use up that camera on my next trip.

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Alright, I’m outta here. I won’t be posting for a couple of days, a six pound laptop seemed like an extravagance. Here’s where I’ll be if you don’t hear from me by Friday.

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I awoke this morning with the idea that by the end of the week I want to spend a couple of nights sleeping under the stars. Unfortunately, that’s going to cost money. I’ve got rain gear, a first aid kit, a stove, and boots, but nothing else in the backpacking/hiking/camping genres. So I drove down to REI, became utterly flummoxed at the sight of the dozens of packs (tents and sleeping bags are easy. Packs make me nervous for they may hurt my back) and walked out with only a book on backpacking.

Tomorrow I go back and max out the new 0.0% APR credit card I just received.

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